Sunday, September 7, 2008
BOBS EYE VIEW
POLL RESULTS
Bobs Eye View's crack pollsters, Gallop, Kanter & Trot, asked 30 people with a flat-line EEG if they thought they were treated unfairly in being denied a Flor-DUH driver's license.
21 had no opinion
9 appeared to blink out a message that said they will be voting for McCain/Palin.
The margin of error for this poll is plus or minus two aspirins the morning after election day.
BOBS EYE VIEW
ON THE ROAD AGAIN
I believe that Flori-DUH has the toughest requirements to obtain a driver's license. Here are ten things you must be able to show or know to get your license.
1) You must exhibit brain waves. If you show a flat line EEG, you will NOT receive a license.
2) You must have at least one eye. The eye doesn't have to work. It just must be in place.
3) You must be able to drive with one hand, while text messaging and giving another driver
"the finger."
4) You must show that you can hear a commercial jet plane taking off while you are standing
alongside the runway.
5) You must show the ability to weave across three lanes of traffic for a length of
one mile.
6) You must know where your turn signals are, and promise never to use them.
7) You must demonstrate that you will never pull over to let any emergency vehicles pass.
8) You don't have to know where your car's seat belts are, but you do have to be able to spell
seat belt
9) You must promise to never use your seat belt.
10) If you have ever accidentally driven up on the sidewalk and smashed through a store's
plate-glass window, you must say you are really, really sorry, and explain that you were
drunk.
SPEAKING OF HIGHWAYS
In this morning's Ft. Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel, it was reported that the federal highway trust fund will run out of money this month. Transportation Secretary Mary Peters (whose qualification for the job was that she once drove a bumper car at an amusement park), said "This will worsen the financial crises many states are already facing, and it will delay or halt needed transportation projects."
Here's a thought. Let's throw out the Republicans who have been ruining this country for the past eight years, and vote in more Republicans. Huh???
SEE YOU SOON.
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