Tuesday, October 13, 2009
BOBS EYE VIEW
WIN A HOUSE
ENTER AN AMAZING BOB'S EYE VIEW CONTEST
Last week on Bill Maher's HBO show, he said he hoped President Obama would repeal the military's policy of "Don't Ask-Don't Tell," if for no other reason than it would make Rush Limbaugh's head explode.
Just about everyone, even little children, know that if Rush Limbaugh's head explodes, this would be a good thing. I have decided to have a contest, and the winner will get my south Florida house free and clear, although I haven't yet told my wife.
All you have to do is submit a suggestion to a radio network that "The Grand Bloviator" works at - something that will result in Mr. Limbutt's head exploding. That's it. If his head explodes as a result of your suggestion, you win my house.
To make the contest a little more difficult, I have suggested a few things that would make Flush Limbaugh's head explode, so you cannot use any of these.
Flush has been picked to be one of seven judges for the 2010 Miss America Pageant. I am not making that up, although I wish I was. Aside from being homophobic, and a racist pig, Flush is also a misogynist, so judging women is a natural for him.
One thing that would make the racist pig's head explode would be to have one third of the Miss America contestants be black.
One thing that would make the homophobic drug addict's head explode would be to have one third of the contestants be gay.
One thing surely to make the gas bag's head explode would be to have one third of the contestants be Hispanic.
Finally, the following people should be selected as fellow judges. This assuredly would make Flush's head explode, and on national TV!
The seven judges for the 2010 Miss America Pageant will be Flush Limpbutt, comedian Lewis BLACK, actor Jack BLACK, rapper Kanye West, Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor, very gay Harvey Feirstein and last, but certainly not least, Wanda Sykes, who is both BLACK and a LESBIAN.
Lastly, no employees of Bob's Eye View who have slept with me are allowed to enter this contest. Good luck.
SEE YOU NEXT TUESDAY.
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