Saturday, May 3, 2008
Bobs Eye View
Warning - Pollsters Are Hazardous To Your Health
As promised, I drove past the Pepto-Bismol Anti-Diarrhea Dome this morning. It is nearly completed, is a beautiful shade of pink, and will seat 37,000 constipated people.
What's the range of a tuba?
If you have a good arm, about 25 yards.
EXIT POLL
I asked 74 of my neighbors their feelings about exit signs.
30 hate exit signs
25 love exit signs
10 wonder why exit signs are always so close to the exits
9 had no opinion
Eye Can See Clearly Now
As I once reported, there is a lasik eye-surgery center here in south Florida that advertises in big print, "Lasik Eye Surgery. $37 per eye." It is only after one puts the ad under the strongest electron microscope on earth that you are able to read the fine print: $37 for 36 months, each eye."
The ad goes on to say that the doctors are board certified and are affiliated with Johns Hopkins Hospital. Let's return for a moment to the electron microscope. It turns out that it is not Johns Hopkins Hospital, but Jim Hopkins Hospital. as far as being board certified, the only board these doctors are certified to work on is an ironing board.
I'll see you (clearly) tomorrow.
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